This is the last article you can comment on for the second half of February.
Here’s a less serious item in honour of Valentine’s Day: three stories about couples getting together because they were both riding the same train. Could such things happen in Slovakia? Are chance romantic meetings like this being slowly replaced by something more deliberate: the internet? Do you believe in love at first sight, which at least some of these people seem to have experienced, or should you be cautious about trusting such a feeling? Also, check out what appears to be a grammar error: “the story would have ended had they had not bumped into each other”
It is almost unbelievable that these people met only by coincidence and yet they are being happy couples. Perhaps there is something in which most people don’t believe and that is that everybody is destined to spend life with one person, who should be “the one”. And it is often said, that such relationship starts with a coincidence by which these people meet and at that instant they feel that the other is the right one. We could see that this was also the case of Jonathan and Jacqueline Roberts. It might seem as a strange feature but evidently, there are lots of such cases. In my opinion, it also has to do something with believing one has a destiny and that the two meet is an arrangement of somebody “up there”. This is also called as the love at first sight and in addition, it is often said that one can experience only one “true love” in their life. It only depends whether or not the couple will manage to go through all the hardships and yet love each other. I personally believe that it if, at some instant in the future, I meet the “right one”, I might know it. I believe that it won’t be the kind of conscious feeling like love or happiness, but I would be unconsciously pressed to go on with the relationship. Most people nowadays think that it can happen only in fairytales, but taking a careful thinking about it, what is the purpose of us being here then? I think it is not earning lots of money and making successful career, although it might be a part of our life. It is about happiness and happiness often comes with love. In addition, I think that everyone ought to learn something whilst being here and perhaps it is learning to love people around us and to help them when they need a hand. Even Jesus said, “Love one another as I have loved you” (JOHN 15:12 NKJ 12) at The Last Supper. In my opinion, perhaps there really exists something like destiny and the true love.
ReplyDeleteIf you don’t search then you don’t find. Or can you find something if you don’t search for it? If the whole “pre-destined love thing” works, doesn’t it mean that even if you don’t search for the love of your life, you will meet her or him anyway since it is predestined. Or okay, maybe some people are not pre-destined to find true love, but then if we apply this to all of the ones who don’t search and don’t find, don’t we come to the statement: The majority of people who don’t search for true love, aren’t pre-destined to find it? And doesn’t this in other words mean: The majority of people, who are pre-destined to find true love, will spend their life searching for it? Don’t know about you, but in my opinion that sounds too far sketched to be true.
ReplyDeleteIn my opinion the reason why in some point of our life we find love, which will last forever, is simply because we search for it. Precisely, search & find love- isn’t that the whole point of our lives? I mean it isn’t just a coincidence that the only common life goal, which can be for sure found in all of us, is: find love. We’ve got in our heads from our early childhood, sometimes as our primary goal, other times not, but what is important; it stays as our goal until it isn’t fulfilled. Even a harsh break up can’t influence the fact that sooner or later we’ll start to search for it again. Moreover, it is exactly this permanent search for love that allowed those people from the article to make the most of those accidents.
And whether I think such accidents can happen also in Slovakia? Yes I resolutely do. Love happens everywhere and even I myself look for potential girlfriends when traveling with the public transports. Yet I haven’t had as much luck as the propagators of the article, nevertheless public transports remain as a place where I will look for love.
Branislav Skocek IB3
The majority of present romantic movies have a simple plot similar to these three stories, and I feel already fed up with them. And that is the reason why these three stories did not exactly dazzle me at first. But when I realized that they were real, I felt entirely differently about them. Nowadays, when you ask any couple how they met, the answer you are most likely about to hear is on the Internet. Maybe in work, or at a party. But the concept of a complete stranger, a co-commuter, becoming your future partner seems incredibly romantic.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I probably would not like being proposed to in the middle of a crowded station hall like Nikki was, it must have been an unforgettable moment for her. And I am sure this is something millions of woman around the world can only dream of. There is also a piece of wonder in the way the lives of Jonathan and Jacqueline crossed. I know quite a few divorced people that are in their forties or fifties, and even though they are open to love again, there is almost no way for them to meet someone of a similar life situation and age. So, even though I do not really believe in things like fate, this story makes me feel like there must be some things that are meant to be. That Jonathan and Jacqueline’s encounter could not have been coincidental.
But however touching these two stories might seem, it is the tale of Mark and Zoë I can relate to the most. I used to go to school on the other side of the city, which meant a lot of commuting. And it would be really weird if there was no one that captured my attention over the years. But due to the fact that I travelled mostly by bus, it seemed too weird to go up and talk to the person I was attracted to in front of all the other, eagerly listening, passengers. And the little crush based purely on physical appearance just was not worth the possible humiliation. However, since then, I have changed a bit and I have even gone to talk to some of my co-commuters and we almost always ended up on good terms. So, who knows? Maybe if I had a crush on someone from the bus now, it would not be so hard to overcome my inhibitions, and to go and talk to him. After all, what could happen if one stranger thinks badly of me?
I must say that this is probably the finest article that I have read ever on this blog. Not just because it certainly gives us a lesson on how to behave at public transport stops, but because it is always pleasant to read these sort of curious love stories . Furthermore this article gives me an opportunity even to mention some of my amusing experiences. And of course, there is also a lot to agree on posted the comments. In other words, an article worth commenting on!
ReplyDeleteThe true story of Mark and Zoe can be understood as a great lesson for all of us. Whether it is love or some kind of other opportunity that will make us happier, we shouldn’t hesitate and take use of it! Therefore I think that Zoe should have contacted Mark the first day she saw him, even though she would risk humiliation as everyone of us would. Instead of that, she was defying her attraction and feelings towards him. I agree with Brano, that we have to search for this opportunity ,to find the real love. But once you are put straightaway in front of this opportunity and as Zuzka says, you know that it’s the right one, it would be literally a sin not to take use of it.
Me and Brano have once committed this sort of a “terrible sin”, probably a month ago in the Bratislava restaurant (another place where you meet many strangers). Two charming girls that were sitting next to us decided not drop either a ticket or a beer mat, they have rather dropped their menu lists. First time they did it, Brano gave it back to them and continued in our debate. When they did it for the second time, we ignored them, so they picked it up on their own. Height of folly was when they did it for the third time within 5 minutes, we started thinking that they are really weird. We caught on their intentions just when we were leaving. Who knows, maybe our destiny was to spend the rest of our lives with them, maybe we would once have the chairs they were sitting on in our living rooms. However in that case, I am glad to have committed this “sin”, because we knew , or at least thought they were not the right ones. Furthermore, a lesson can be also taken from our example, a good football debate can save you from lifelong commitments.
I basically agree on all the comments, but especially the ending of Zuskas comment is worth mentioning. She raised a great point by quoting Jesus, what I would like to cover in a bit more detail. Love is an ambiguous word, but only an idiot doesn’t love his family members and life partner. Love that Jesus means in Zuzkas quote, is the love towards all those strangers standing on the train station. Sometimes we may be granted with a bonus for this love, by meeting our ideal life partner. My point is that when we stand on the bus stop in the morning, we shouldn’t be suspicious or careless of all the people around. I live in Slovakia for 5 years already, but I have never seen a smiling person in my morning bus.
Brano:
ReplyDeleteYour first part of a comment is a little bit confusing, but i guess I
see your point. Pre-destination of love is, in fact, a believe which
some decide to follow and some not. But even if you decide not to
follow it, you still search to reach your goal and that is to find
love. So yes, I agree with what you wrote.
However, I see the article more like an advise for our society rather
than a proof that pre-destined love exist. In each Valentine's story
is an initiator who developed their commuting into a marriage. To do so extreme courage and open-midness are needed as an innitiator must
overcome a boundary of talking to uknowns and be prepared for various
endings, even humiliation. That is why such cases of meeting don't
occur so often, because people lack courage and open-mindness.
Actually you might have thought of it but i do not think that "search
of love" implies also these qualities. I see it as spying on your potential love and
then what? You mostly wait until he/she proposes something first.Pitty.
The one last point i want to add up is that you mentioned that
everybody will find new love after a break up. But have you thought of
some poeple who had already their love, considered it the one and
pre-destined, and their half accidentally died? They do not think of the new one
because they already had pre-destined relationship. Same applies to
religious people, christians mainly, who follow their rules of not being
married the second time. Overall, providing these facts, I think that
to believe in a pre-destined love is not a good idea as some might end
up being alone for the rest of their lives.
Yesterday we had a debate with Brano and there was one thing that we were debating and I said I didn’t like the word “search”, because I don’t understand how somebody can search for love. Does it mean that one looks everywhere around them, analyzing “well, maybe this guy could be fine for me”? That seems a little bit exaggerated and such person would seem desperate. Even I have experienced such “desperate state”, because I was missing love in my life. Of course, I haven’t found anybody. After a few months, I gave up. Surprisingly, only after 2 weeks of stopping my search I met a boy which I fell for. I believe then that meeting a person, that we fall in love with, is usually caused by a coincidence. It is not about trying to find such person, although I have to admit, that in their very soul everybody hopes that they will meet that person.
ReplyDelete@Olga
ReplyDeleteOli, I am glad you see my point and agree with it. Further on I would like to stress that I am aware of the courage and open-mindness it takes for one to talk to a stranger. However I think I possess these qualities, because I have already talked to anonymous potential girlfriends a few times before. Moreover I do think “search for love” implies these qualities since in one point or another you might need to show these qualities if you want to experience appreciated and reciprocated love. Finally I appreciate a lot that you mentioned the accidental deaths even if it’s a sensitive topic. In my opinion, if you find love that will last forever and accidentally lose it, usually with time you do start to search for new love again, since you don’t want to be alone. In one of my songs I sing the real meaning of our life is to say we instead I. This fits perfectly to the theory of searching for new love again. Additionally you might even find new love, but then wouldn’t that mean your previous love wasn’t the “right one”? I think it depends. I mean what if you suddenly find out he/she is still alive. I think you wouldn’t be able to love them equally. But who knows? However the other case might be that you won’t search for new love again, because you won’t be able to love somebody as much as you loved your lost love. But how can you know? All in all I must agree I haven’t thought of the accidental deaths when I wrote my comment and now I must admit that some people won’t start to search for new love after a harsh break up, because for them it was the “right one” already so their search is completed, but their faith is out of luck.
Branislav Skocek IB3
@Zuzka
ReplyDeleteZuzka and I had been talking constantly about this amazing, transcendental, divine and so controversial topic for two days in a row. I think now Zuzka understands that what I meant by “search for love” is exactly what she wrote at end of her comment. It is precisely that everybody way down in their very soul hopes that he/she will meet that unique person once in their lifetime. Like I said, sometimes it is our primary goal, other times not, but what is important; it stays as our goal until it isn’t fulfilled. However even if I don’t believe in pre-destined love as Zuzka does, I like her first comment anyway and I fully respect her opinion. What I mostly like about Zuzka’s comment is the part where she talks about happiness, which often comes with love, being the purpose of us being here. Further on when she adds that she thinks that everyone ought to learn something whilst being here and perhaps it is learning to love people around us and to help them when they need a hand. I truly agree with that and in addition I also appreciate that she used as an example of this one of Jesus’ sayings.
Branislav Skocek IB3
@Dominik
ReplyDeleteDominik, generally I am well disposed to your comment. I agree with you that love is an ambiguous word and that one type of love is such that each and every individual should show towards any stranger. I love the part where you say sometimes we may be granted with a bonus for this love, by meeting our ideal life partner. Further on I also agree to your point where you say we shouldn’t be suspicious or careless of all the people around, when we stand on the bus stop in the morning. I have also been living in Slovakia for most of my life, but I barely see people smiling and not only in the morning. Therefore I feel completely the same way about this as you. Moreover, I also hate about Slovaks that they usually take a murderous glance at you when you step into the bus with a good mood and a smile on your face. Nonetheless, I found one contradiction in your comment.
You said it would be a terrible sin to squander the opportunity to talk to someone, who you feel is the “right one”. Then you said you and me once committed this kind of a terrible sin by ignoring those girls. However then you talk about how we had known they weren’t the “right” ones anyway. That’s the thing: Since we had known they weren’t the right ones, in what way have we committed the terrible sin? Nevertheless, I must agree with you that it truly would be a terrible sin to waste an opportunity like that. However how can we know it’s the right one, when we haven’t even talked to her/him yet? I suppose one of the attributes girls, that we look at, usually have is: a good look. But both you and I know that is not enough for her to be the “right” one. Therefore I think it is really either a sign from above that we feel it is the “right” one or it is something special about that girl. Maybe she gives you the sweetest smile or maybe she wears the Slovak football national dress (that would be a strong factor in our cases). Maybe it’s even a combination of both, where the presence of that something special is a sign from God, which eventually makes us realize it is the “right” one. All in all I think it doesn’t matter whether it’s any of those three, for each case tells us that love is the greatest thing that God had sent us a long, long time ago.
Branislav Skocek IB3 (official February comment on comment)